Change efforts may fail or even cause injury to ourselves when:
1) Our attitude is self-critical - we try to change what we don’t like about ourselves without sufficient and compassionate understanding.
2) Our attitude is normative ― we try to make ourselves more “normal” or base our efforts on comparing ourselves with others.
3) We lack understanding of how change can begin in chaos and disturbance - we mistake disorder, breakdown, and the inability to maintain old patterns for thinking something is wrong with us.
― David Bedrick
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