With love, grit & therapy, Mary Pipher speaks to America on the environment
Pipher: First, I’d be respectful of America as a patient, just as I am of clients in therapy. But one thing I’d assume about my client is something I generally assume about clients who are behaving in a dysfunctional manner: at some level, they know what’s going on.
So I’d take it as a given that by now most people have been exposed to issues around climate change. At this point to focus on information would be like telling an alcoholic, “Did you know that it’s harmful for you to drink ten beers?” Of course that person knows that! Instead I’d immediately turn my attention to defenses and resistance.
Dealing with people who are struggling with denial is what therapists do for a living. That’s not cause to be judgmental; in fact I have an enormous amount of sympathy for the country as it faces this situation because it’s unbearably painful to deal with head on.
Pythia: Do you feel that an alarmist approach isn’t useful in generating more action on environmental issues?
Pipher: There’s been a scolding tone: Why don’t people just wake up and deal with the facts? But people don’t respond to guilt and scolding. What people do tend to respond to, whether they’re therapy clients or consumers of media, is a deep belief that they’re loved by the messenger. So as a therapist, speaker or writer, my first goal is to love that person, and my country, and to hold them in my heart as I try to help them cope with upsetting information.
Pythia: And to America, you would say?
Pipher: To America, my patient, I would start by saying this: I deeply want to understand this place you’re in at this moment. Why, from your point of view, is this issue so painful? Is it thinking about your grandchildren’s endangered future, or the disappearance of a nearby forest you love? Or is it thinking about how hard it would be for you to imagine changing your life, and how painful it would be to feel like a victim -- whatever it is that keeps you from being able to accept this information, let’s try to understand that first.
Because resistance follows the process of accepting difficult information, I’d expect people to be angry, and to say things like, “I feel badly about it, but what can I do?” In listening very carefully to what “America” is saying about its collective anguish and inability to deal with this situation, I’d respond with using the client’s own language and the metaphors.
Pythia: And some examples of that would be?
Pythia: This was exemplified in your book in the figure of Randy Thompson, a “political conservative who looked like John Wayne and dressed in jeans…and a cowboy hat and boots,” and a Keystone XL activist who became the image of Nebraskans’ fight against TransCanada.
Mary: A lot of the language in my book and in our struggle references iconic American symbols like Randy: “We will not be bullied,” or “I stand with Randy,” or “I’m fighting TransCanada.” One reason Randy has been such a powerful symbol is because he uses wonderful John Wayne American language.
Pythia: In addition to using classic American symbols and language to awaken “America on your couch” to the urgency of climate change, what other therapeutic techniques would you draw on?
Mary: A good therapeutic tool is the “crossroads technique.” Say a client was struggling with a problem with alcohol. I might say, “Do you realize you’re at a crossroads, and that the decision you make today can take you down one road toward more despair and guilt -- or it can take you down another road toward a healthy new life?”
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