Big thanks to my friends Wendy and Barb for sharing this article and the great laughter it induces - a definite antidote and balancing to all the heartache of recent years! Ha! Enjoy! :-) Molly
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Dangerous species released back into Wyoming wilderness
January 20, 2009
CASPER, Wyo. – Wyoming officials today confirmed the reintroduction of an aggressive, notoriously mean-tempered species into the state’s vast wilderness. Two Cheneys, a male and a female, were set free today in central Wyoming, a reality that leaves some local residents uneasy.
Officials are optimistic the Cheneys will adapt comfortably to their surroundings and stated the possibility of one confronting a human is remote. However, they were quick to point out the contrary nature of the Cheney and its predilection for violence.
As Wyoming residents contemplate the possibility of encountering a Cheney, something which was comfortably unthinkable over the past eight years, the United States Fish and Wildlife Service along with other local non-governmental organizations has been working closely with local communities to improve awareness about the species and best practices if a Cheney is spotted near a population center.
This marks the first time Cheneys have been integrated into the wilderness for almost a decade, and experts believe the 150- to 200-pound creatures will naturally confine themselves to a chosen Jackson Hole habitat about 2500 acres in area.
“I personally liked knowing the Cheney was under a watchful eye and hundreds of miles away,” said Mitchell Kiser, a resident of Jackson. “I’m not sure how comfortable I am with everyday things now, like talking on the phone, knowing the Cheney’s disposition for wiretapping.”
Some residents believe they have ample reason for concern. During a February 2006 trial wilderness release on Texas ranchland the aggressive male Cheney coexisted in close proximity with humans for only 43 minutes before causing harm to a nearby 78-year-old attorney, inflicting serious injuries to his face and neck.
Since being removed from the Wyoming landscape nearly a decade ago, the Cheneys have remained under the care of the American Enterprise Institute in Washington, D.C. There they have been surrounded by species of similar temperaments in hopes of improving their social behavior, an experiment wildlife officials say yielded mixed results.
“We expect the Cheney to pose roughly the same danger to residents as the Northern Rockies gray wolf,” said Kenneth Black, a ranger with the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service in Wyoming. “If you see the Cheney in the wild, do not approach one, but this variety of Cheney should not show any aggression toward you as long as you remain at a safe distance and vote republican.”
A potential risk also exists for the Cheney in the wild, as the Cheney, along with the Northern Rockies gray wolf, lost its protected species status under the Bush administration’s Endangered Species Act. Most feel the released Cheneys will have no trouble surviving, however, due to the creature’s ability to effectively conceal itself in elaborately secured bunkers.
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At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a
kaleidoscope of new possibilities.
~ Jean Houston
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