A Compassionate Look at the Great Grief of These Covid Times

I have removed a post that I recently did after it became clear that the anger expressed in that particular post that I resonated with was misunderstood. I was not targeting any specific person or persons with my anger because they have not been vaccinated for Covid-19. But I was feeling an intensity of anger towards the coronavirus itself. 

 

I will also not deny that I've often been infuriated with those like Mr. Trump and too many other people in positions of power who've spread dangerous disinformation about the the virus, the vaccines, and the need to follow all CDC protocols — and all with disastrous consequences. This disinformation has killed thousands of people. And I am indeed incredibly angry about that.

 

And then there are the deepest experiences of my heart. Given that anger is always a secondary emotion that is on the surface of deeper emotions, I've also long been aware that under my anger is overwhelming grief. It is this grief that I most often am in touch with. Every day I grieve...

 

I grieve for those I know who’ve gotten seriously sick with the coronavirus, who’ve died, and who are now long haulers with debilitating symptoms that are persisting months after an initial diagnosis. I grieve for all those I don’t know who are struggling right now in this very moment — struggling to stay alive, struggling with the death of a loved one, struggling with the trauma of neurological and other lasting symptoms of being a Covid long hauler.

 

I grieve for the 60,000 new Covid-19 cases that are happening each and every day right now today and day after day here in America. I grieve that my country has suffered more coronavirus cases and deaths than anywhere else in the world.

 

I grieve for Dr. Fauci and his family and Governor Whitmer and so many others who’ve been demonized, hated and harassed, and received death threats for being strong voices of essential truths related to the coronavirus and actions vital to the safety and protection of us all.

 

I grieve for the healthcare providers who are overwhelmed with the trauma of witnessing the impact of Covid day after day, month after month, and the PTSD and grief that is their daily experience. I grieve for the nursing homes, the funeral homes, the essential workers who are at risk, who are traumatized, who are carrying the consciousness of the profound costs and losses of this pandemic.

 

I grieve for those who've lost their jobs, their homes, their ability to reliably feed themselves and their families. I grieve for those without healthcare or with inadequate healthcare or who are trying to pay impossibly exorbitant medical bills. I grieve for all who are impoverished and suffering from even more acute isolation, addictions, anxiety and depression, racism and inequity, and other forms of trauma which the pandemic has grievously exasperated.

 

I grieve for those I know and those I don't who are unable to be vaccinated because of their histories of serious adverse reactions to vaccines. I grieve for the inequities that result in wealthier nations again and again and again having preferential treatment and access to life saving resources. I grieve the policies and practices rooted in racism, vulture capitalism, and greed that have always killed people and certainly long before Covid-19 emerged.

 

I could go on.

 

Now, with the advent of vaccines for the coronavirus, there is the beginning of light at the end of the tunnel. And this is where I am at personally and what my truth is. Yes, regardless of any risks of being vaccinated, I choose to be vaccinated — and I am profoundly grateful. Millions in my nation and billions worldwide haven’t yet experienced the privilege that I have. And my heart aches for all who are not protected. 

 

This is also about far more than personal choice. For me — in walking my talk related to my spiritual path and my commitment and intentions to do no harm and to alleviate the suffering in the world — my choices always have ripple effects. In choosing to be vaccinated, I’m also standing in protection of others. I’m assuming my collective responsibility to do my part in doing everything humanly possible to intervene on a global pandemic that’s now killed more than 3 million people. That’s THREE MILLION human beings who’ve died of Covid-19. 

 

The ripples that I send out into the world matter and matter deeply. I believe the science and that it is indeed incredibly important for as many of us as possible, and as soon as possible, to be vaccinated. I believe that this is an imperative. 

 

And may we remember that no matter the diverse needs, choices, resources of information, perspectives, and experiences of others, let us do our best to not pile on shame or blame to these already profoundly tender times. We truly are all in this together. May we all be safe and protected. And above all else, may kindness prevail.

 

Bless us all,

Molly