What would we do without satire?! Ha! - Molly
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz
Report)—In an interview with NBC’s Lester Holt, Donald Trump boasted
that, if he is impeached, the television ratings will be higher than those of
any other impeachment in history.
“Everywhere I go, people tell me that if I am impeached, they’re
going to watch it,” he said. “The ratings are going to be through the roof.”
He said that he expected his impeachment ratings to be “many, many
times” the size of the audience for Bill Clinton’s impeachment, in 1998.
“It’s not even going to be close,” Trump said. “The ratings for
Bill Clinton’s impeachment were a joke.”
Asked about the recent impeachment of the former South Korean
President Park Geun-hye, Trump said, “Did anyone even watch that one? That was
Korea. Nobody cares.”
As for the impeachment of Brazilian President Dilma Rousseff, he
said, “I didn’t hear about that one. I don’t follow Brazil. I like Argentina. I
saw ‘Evita’ many, many times. Andrew Lloyd Webber did a great job. Millions and
millions of people loved it. But that was a Broadway show, not an impeachment.”
Even though he anticipates “just terrific” ratings for his
impeachment, Trump said that he did not expect the media to provide an honest
accounting of his audience size.
“They’re going to lie and say that a lot of people who watched my
impeachment didn’t watch, and that’s going to be very bad and unfair, but it’s
not going to change the fact that my impeachment will be a great impeachment, a
really beautiful impeachment,” he said.
Please go here for the original article: https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-boasts-that-his-impeachment-will-get-higher-tv-ratings-than-all-other-impeachments
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