Gratitude: An Anniversary for Judith Duerk & Me

On one of several women's retreats I have done

with Judith over the years.

Gratitude

Nearly 30 years ago I struggled, when asked, to write a gratitude list.

Time passed....

Today I am rooted in a daily practice of gratitude - and my gratitude

list goes on without end - all, in part, due to the extraordinary

people who have graced and blessed my life over the years.

They have made all the difference.

Judith Duerk - mentor, author, psychotherapist, teacher of

T'ai Chi Ch'uan, and leader of women - is among them.

Last night I came home to an unexpected voicemail message

from Judith. It has been a while since we last talked.

My heart always smiles to hear from her.

Tonight it came to me to explore the exact date when I first

met Judith. I looked in my original copy of Judith's first book --

Circle of Stones: Woman's Journey to Herself

and found the date of when I first heard Judith speak at the

Northwest Service Center here in Portland:

May 10th, 1990.

Yesterday was the 20 year anniversary.

Judith writes:

How might your life be different if, as a young woman there had been a place for you, a place where you could go to be among women... a place for you when you had feelings of darkness? And, if there had been another woman, somewhat older, to be with you in your darkness, to be with you until you spoke... spoke out your pain and anger and sorrow.

And, if you had spoken until you had understood the sense of your feelings, how they reflected your own nature, your own deepest nature, crying out of the darkness, struggling to be heard.

And, what if, after that, every time you had feelings of darkness, you knew that the woman would come to be with you, and would sit quietly by as you went into your darkness to listen to your feelings and bring them to birth... So that, over the years, companioned by the woman, you learned to no longer fear your darkness, but to trust it... to trust it as the place where you could meet your own deepest nature and give it voice.

How might your life be different if you could trust your darkness... could trust your own darkness?

Judith, perhaps more than anyone else, has been this woman for me.

A presence in my life - outwardly and inwardly - as I have gradually

awakened, grown stronger, remembered, healed, deepened,

expanded. And my life has been transformed.

And the gifts of the alchemist are no longer unknown to me.

Nor is the beauty of my own true nature.

Or yours.

May we have the courage and support to embrace the

darkness, beauty, and strength within our hearts.

My process is on-going...

Generosity. Gifts. Gratitude.

May we all receive, be transformed, and pass it on...

Peace & brightest blessings ~ Molly

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"We will go as deep as the support we perceive is available to us." ~ a quote I remember from the early years of my awakening...